Our problems

shower with me

Sperm grows

Advice for men

You!!!

I got this!!

A trolly ram

Nuff said..

Let your monkey enjoy life..

Woman never satisfied..

Tenants..

A man mentioned to his landlord about the tenants in the apartment over his. "Many a night they stamp on the floor and shout till midnight." When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, "Not really, for I usually stay up and practice my trumpet till about that time most every night anyway."
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Drugstore clerk!!

The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against wall.
The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"

The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough.
I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."

The owner says, "You idiot! You can't treat a cough with laxatives!"

The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he's afraid to cough!"
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Christmas tunes..

Dashing thru the snow...on a V8 wondersled... crashing into trees...cos I'm off my fucking head...Been smoking santa's pipe...a dozen beers or more...I'm heading to the the red light zone to get myself a whore... Oh... Jingle bells, Jingle bells santa's smokin weed.... Mrs. Claus is on the floor...she's overdosed on speed...Blitzens fucked, the elves are too..they're trippin off their heads..If Rudolf snorts another line the twat will wind up dead!!
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Yo Mama..

Something Fucking touched me..

Sneaky Drinky..

I'm sorry Savannah, but that night we went to Southern comfort, I saw you kissing Captain Morgan and you had sex on the beach with Jack Daniels... You broke my Red heart! But guess what??? I played you with your own Four cousins!
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Little toe..

A guy is standing next to a gorgeous woman at a bar. He leans over and says, "You remind me of my little toe" She replies, "What?...I'm small and cute?" He says "No. I'll probably bang you on the coffee table later when I'm drunk"
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The polite way to go Pee..

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:

'Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,
how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?'
Michael said: 'Just a minute I have to go pee.'
The teacher responded by saying: 'That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?'
Sherman said: 'I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.'
'That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?'
Johnny said I would say:
'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment?
I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine,
whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.'
The teacher fainted!

Give that lighty a bells
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Mmm.. A beautiful woman..

If you come across a hot, beautiful woman who is mature, smart, humble, educated, financially loaded, passionate & patient...who is a great house wife, who is not materialistic, who is a great lover & is attentive to her partners needs...
Please be assured that the marijuana you have just smoked is of superior quality...
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Oh Dr.Phil..

Dr. Phil and Obsessions
-------------------------

Dr. Phil was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.

"You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, he said, "you are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second mom. "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turns to the third mom. "Your obsession is alcohol. This, too, manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother gets up takes her little boy by the hand and whispers, "Come on Dick! We're leaving."
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